Questions

How do you know that someone is telling you the truth? Can you tell if they aren't? Obviously I don't know everything about everyone, but what if I'm missing something big? I'm not talking about everyone I know, but just someone in particular.

I really want to go home for Thanksgiving. I was in my room tonight after being gone all day, and I was listening to Christmas music. I know, it's early. But I only have a month to listen to it, and there is something so comforting about those songs I have sung all my life. I was listening to Christmas music, and suddenly I was so homesick that I had tears in my eyes. And I wasn't homesick for just the city I'm from. I was homesick for how it used to be when I lived close to my grandparents and my cousins. We always had huge family Thanksgivings and tag games and I miss that. Now we live 2000 miles away, and I am a little sad. I want to sit at my grandmother's worn out oak table and have her set one of her home cooked meals on the place mat in front of me. I want to hold my cousin's little girl. I want to sit on the old porch swing and look out over the pastures of the family farm. Most of all, I want to see my grandfather again. He passed away one year ago at this time, and all I want is to hug him again. To smell his tobacco and khaki scent and to feel his scratchy flannel shirt as he kisses me on the cheek. To see him smile at all of us grandchildren. I can't really describe how close my family feels at those gatherings, because there is nothing in the world like it, and no one else would fully understand. And now he's missing from those, and it is weird.

Wow, how depressing. But I'm just in that homesick state of mind. So I'm going to listen to more Bing Crosby and go to sleep. Tomorrow's Friday!